Hello there, magnificent readers! Ready to embark on a hilarious journey through the whimsical world of sight loss encounters? I'm Philip Francis Anderson, your friendly sight-loss warrior and podcast host with a knack for turning awkward moments into comedic gold. Therefore, hold onto your hats, folks, as we dive into the zany world of approaching someone with sight loss. Get ready for cheeky anecdotes, chortles and maybe a wink or two!

1. The "Hey, I'm here!" Tap Dance

Imagine this: You're out and about, and suddenly, you spot me, your sightless companion, navigating the world like a boss. Instead of enrolling me in a spontaneous dance class by dragging me across the road, how about a polite greeting or a gentle tap on the shoulder? A sly shoulder pat, or a casual: ‘Hello’ is all it takes to get my attention, without the dance routine!

2. The "It's Me, Not the Ghost!" Introduction

Ah, the classic vanishing act! One moment we're deep in conversation, and the next, poof! I'm left talking to thin air like a magician's assistant. Fear not, dear friend, I'm not a ghost! Just bid me farewell with a cheery "Tallyho, Philip!" before you go on your merry way.

3. The "Talk to Me, Not About Me" Pep Talk

Imagine being talked about like a mythical creature that's just out of sight. Here's a novel idea: Include me in the conversation! I promise, I'm a real person with feelings and thoughts, not an enigmatic being to be discussed in hushed tones.

4. The "Walking Stick is Not a Leash" Revelation

Newsflash: My white cane is not a secret leash to manoeuvre me around like a puppet. If I need a hand crossing the road, I'll give you the cue. Let's save the leash games for adorable pooches and keep our interactions respectful and courteous.

5. The "Guide Dog vs. Traffic Light" Dilemma

Have you ever witnessed the epic battle between a guide dog and a traffic light? Neither have I! So, when you see me at the crossroads, deep in thought, rest assured I'm just waiting for the right time to venture forth, like a daring explorer plotting their next move.

6. The "Restaurant Hide-and-Seek" Protocol

Let's play a little game of hide-and-seek! If you need to dash off to the loo while dining with me, give me a friendly heads-up before you disappear. Otherwise, you might return to find me chatting away with the menu, exploring the culinary possibilities!

7. The "Fashion Show and Tell"

Fashionista alert! If you're my fashion guru and helping me pick the perfect outfit, don't forget to provide the crucial details - like the colour and pattern. Otherwise, I might show up to the event like a walking rainbow that Picasso himself would envy!

8. The "Eye Contact, My Friend"

Admitted, my eyes might not join the party, but my ears are always up for some good old-fashioned storytelling. Keep that eye contact going, and I'll feel like the star of the show, even if my gaze goes slightly astray.

9. The "GPS Guru" Myth Buster

Now, here's a misconception for you: No, I don't have a built-in GPS! While my sense of direction might be a tad unreliable, who doesn't love a spontaneous adventure? Embrace the uncertainty with me, and we'll have stories to share for ages!

10. The "Communication is Key"

Last but certainly not least, let's embrace the power of communication and my famous mantra, "Be curious, not critical." If you have any queries about sight loss or how to assist me better, just ask away. Together, we can create a world that's inclusive, informative, and overflowing with laughter.

In conclusion, my fabulous readers, let's embark on this uproarious journey of understanding and compassion. Armed with these ten riotously proper ways to approach someone with sight loss and my mantra to be curious, not critical, we can spread joy, bust myths, and laugh our way to a more inclusive world. Therefore, my fellow adventurers, go forth and conquer with humour and heart! Until we meet again, this is Philip Francis Anderson, your sightless companion in crime, signing off with an invisible wink and a tummy full of laughter!

Cheerio,

Philip